The beginning….. I had paid for my DSTV over the phone way before my cut off time but I still got cut off so I decided to call the call the dstv call center to get this fixed. She picked up on the other line “goodmorning welcome to dstv, my name is ***** how may I help you” and even though I didn’t know this girl but by the tone in her voice I could tell something was wrong. I just gave her an encouraging pep talk and a joke here and there while she sorted my issue just to make her feel better. Later she emailed me and I emailed back. This went on a whole month then We moved it to Facebook, texts, calls and eventually We met up and started dating. It was long distance but We where committed. Constant texts, calls, video chats even praying together. I was so into this girl. She understood me and I her. Physical time with her was the best and for a while I honestly was happy.
Months went by eventually she met friends and family and was my profile picture everywhere. Most guys just say this but because I know she’ll never read this I can be honest. “I loved this girl! ” like genuine type of love. Never cheated or even came close to considering such. I prayed for her more than I would pray about anyone or anything else. I would randomly without her knowing fast for her. I’d seed at church for her and did everything possible to the best of my strength to help her pursue and attain her dreams but I guess that wasn’t enough because soon she just became distant, offish and disconnected.
The story changed real quick and here I was desperately trying to locate and fix the matter when the issue was that she just wasn’t into me anymore, she had met someone else. One day my brother while out with his friends bumps into her at some club with her new man, I’m over here thinking girl is at her sister’s place but I was wrong. I confronted her about it, soon she came clean (with an attitude) and confessed to things with “no name other guy”. I wasn’t ready for this. I have no words to describe the pain. My heart bled so much I literally, physically was in pain. Worst part was now she made it seem like I’m a bother to her and everything We had had was in my head. I sank to the bottom. My world came to a complete stop. I was all sorts of confused and couldn’t even pray about it because I’d fail to describe the hurt and just cry in the presence of God. Weeks, months I was torn and it hurt till one day it didn’t and looking back here’s advice to someone out there on how to get out of the pain when someone breaks your heart.
Four quick steps to start help you get over the pain ♥
1. Vent. Let out the frustration how you know to do it. Could be loud music, time out with friends, screaming, crying or whatever it is but be honest enough to let out the frustration because you at this point are not okay so no need to pretend to be.
2. Pray. the best place to get something repaired is to take it back to the maker. Your heart was created by God and when We make a mess or get hurt, run back to the Potter. Time with Jesus will ease the pain and give you strength. This kind of healing is permanent and allows for you to enter into the next relationship in a healthy state.
3. Eliminate reminders. Free you phone and laptop and living space of things that remind you of this pain, this person. No need to be friends with them on social media and risk being bombarded with pictures of them and their new other. Some people don’t agree with this point but my question to those people is how Can you move on if you keep holding on to the irrelevant? Would you like to enter into a relationship with someone who keeps pictures of his/her ex in their phone? Why keep any item of theirs? Start over, get your own stuff.
4. Allow yourself time to heal. Sometimes We bury pain and find ways to mask it by being too excessive in one way or another. For some people this could be overdoing the nights out or engaging in multiple sexual relations etc. These may only temporarily give you some false form of freedom for your pain but rest assured you will have yourself to deal with when you wake up or lay in bed alone at night.
In conclusion, it’s bound to happen to everyone that you find someone who causes you pain but dust yourself up and prepare yourself for better. Solomon, the wisest man! in the Bible couldn’t have put it better when he said in Pro 4.23 ” Keep your heart with all vigilance; for from it flow the springs of life. ” and in Pro 3.1 “ Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not rely on your own insight. “
There’s lots of heartbreakers out there but there’s good ones too, happy loving, all the best シ